I don’t remember ever wanting to run away as a child.
Although I do remember walking to the corner of our street alone when I was around the age of 4.
I stood there & made a fist with my tiny little hand. My thumb sticking up ninety degrees.
I had no idea what hitchhiking was, but I was inspired by this cool thumb gesture that I had seen in a movie. Movies have been inspiring me as far back as I can remember, perhaps not always with good outcome but inspiring me none the less.
But within moments my mother swiftly let me know how uninspiring my little thumb gesture was.
I remember her face.
Which years later after becoming a mother myself, I recognize this look as fear, not anger.
Tears sprung from my eyes because I hadn't even realized I was doing anything wrong.
Childhood innocence.
I realized years later how much this little innocent gesture must've terrified her. The potential of grief and harm it could've caused.
This was the late 70's, kidnapping was a very real thing. The outcome of that day could've ended so much differently then it did.
I never thought of running away.
And although back in that era it was passed off in a joking manner as a rite of passage, it wasn’t anything that ever crossed my mind.
Today people post cute little videos of toddlers walking down the driveway, rolling their little suitcase behind them or just carrying their blankie, declaring that they are running away.
I never did that.
It never crossed my mind.
Perhaps that is why it does now.
I skipped over that rite of passage as a youngster.
Let’s be real.
There are times when life becomes too much. The people you live with become too much. And you don’t love them any less, you just need a break.
Work becomes too much. Or too mundane. The day to day routine feels stagnant. Or overwhelming.
You just need space from it all.
Alone.
An escape.
The little flame in your gut keeps nudging at you to… "Run away".
Come on, I can’t be the only one who has ever felt this?!
It’s almost as if as an adult,
our version of running away
is classified as a Vacation.
But honestly,
I’d even settle for a Time Out.
Don't judge. You know you can relate.
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